An advertisement for a fictional raceway in Gainesville. Made by Chris Zutes.
Hey Skip, what the H-E-double hockey sticks are we gonna do tonight?? Well Reginald, we can go to the Jack Johnson laser light show, the Swamp Planetarium, or drop by the stamp collectors expo.
Nuts to that.
Can't we do something a little more EXTREEEEME?
Race fans! Load up your flask, Get your ass down to Gainesville Raceway for Tire squealin Saturday! Alachua's most RAD demolition action. School bus Smashemups! Sprint Car (??), Death defying Segway races, (VROOM!) All drivers will be ON FIRE AT ALL TIMES! (Ow Owww) Bring the kids, bring the wife, bring your DAD!
Oh Pish Posh, I have a cricket match on Saturday...
FUCK YOU DAD! Get there early for nickel hot dogs and 2 for 1 Moonshine slammers! (woooo doggy) First 50 race fans get to kick a Jeff Gordon lookalike in the nuts! (OW)
Tire squealin Saturday, the most Assphalt kickin time in Alachua! This Saturday at Gainesville Raceway. Gainesville Raceway, it's EXTREEEEEEEEEME! (Gainesville Raceway is not responsible for any spectator related injuries, 7 drink minimum for adults, 4 for 18 and under. Arrive alive, don't drink and driiiiiiiive)
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